Funny Slogans

Here are some slogans that you can use on T-Shirts or bumper stickers
that is sure to bring a smile on the lips of the person reading the
same:

If there is no god, who pops up the next kleenex?

Jesus saves sinners and redeems them for cash and valuable prizes.

If at first you don't succeed skydiving is not for you.

Five days a week my body is a temple. The other two it's an amusement park.

People who say you can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

I am a Nobody. Nobody is Perfect. Therefore I am Perfect.

Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

If Noah had been smart he would have swatted those two flies.

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow
is not looking good either.

Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

How come we have to choose from just 2 persons for president, and 50
for Miss America?

We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.

Ninety-nine percent of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.

The more I learn about terrorism, the more I understand the phone company.

Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig.

I want to die while asleep like my grandfather, not screaming in
terror like the passengers in his car.

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